You Don't Have to Be Mad to Work Here - A Psychiatrist's Life by Benji Waterhouse

You Don't Have to Be Mad to Work Here - A Psychiatrist's Life by Benji Waterhouse

Author:Benji Waterhouse [Waterhouse, Benji]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Biography & Autobiography, Personal Memoirs, Medical (Incl. Patients), Health & Fitness, Mental Health, Medical, Psychiatry, General, Science & Technology, Physician & Patient, Self-Help
ISBN: 9781529927665
Google: bEvREAAAQBAJ
Publisher: Random House
Published: 2024-05-15T23:00:00+00:00


16

Paige

On Sunday morning I’m on-call again and the huge whiteboard of psychiatric referrals is already full of names, so the second board is out. Never a good sign.

I now sometimes see simpler cases first as it helps psychologically to cross off some names early doors. I begin with a familiar one, reasoning I can discharge her quickly.

I enter Bay 7 in A&E to find an emergency doctor suturing Paige’s self-harm wounds. She’s wearing last night’s summer dress with the instantly recognisable ‘Mam’ and ‘Dad’ tattoos on each arm in their smudged, pale red hearts.

Yesterday she added a new word to her collection, slicing it deep into her thigh with a carving knife, past the epidermis and the dermis and into the subcutaneous fat beneath. With her legs outstretched on the bed, the skin flops out unnaturally on each side, creating gaping white gashes like shark attack injuries I’ve seen in photos.

Non-lethal self-harm is sometimes dismissively called a ‘cry for help’, but it can be an attempt to communicate pain. Sometimes the message is easier to understand than others and the poker-faced doctor is a model of professionalism as she traces the angles of Paige’s four-letter expletive with her needle and suture. Starting with the ‘C’.

‘Morning Paige. I’m Benjamin the on-call psychiatrist this weekend. We’ve met a few times now.’

Paige looks up briefly from playing Candy Crush on her phone. ‘Oh, it’s you.’

I remember the first time I met Paige with Dr Glick when she was considering jumping from her second-floor flat window. Back then I’d railed against the uncaring system, if only in my head. Vowed that I would do better.

The second time we met was when her boyfriend kicked her door down just before Christmas and I got in Dr Glick’s good books for discharging her so decisively.

Since then I can see from the notes that she’s seen multiple psychiatrists. The most recent entry is from Nafisa:

Patient attended A&E saying she was going to kill herself this evening but tellingly came with an overnight bag packed. When I refused admission she pulled a handful of paracetamols from her pocket and put them in her mouth. She then asked for a glass of water and was angry when I refused. She then tried crunching them but too dry and she ended up spitting them out. Finally she tried to throw the weighted A&E furniture at me, but unsuccessful. She stormed out stating that she’d made her point.



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